"So Long Sweet Summer"

So, in case you haven't figured it out, whoever you may be, don't know if anyone is reading this, but all the titles of my posts are songs that will seem to represent my post somehow.

So i guess the reason i even started this blog is because its a good outlet for me right now. I love to write. I'm taking a creative writing class right now because writing seems to calm me down. Though i hate the class, i think its just because of the professor and the classroom setting more so than the content of the class. I think i'm just over the "going to class" portion of my life. But yea, i just have so many thoughts going on in my head that i need a place to get them out to. I have few people who truly understand what i'm going through right now, although God did seem to present a very cool dude in my life who is facing a similar situation of a daunting weight pushing down on his shoulders.

Just recently i saw a movie call "(500) Days of Summer." Have you seen it? You should see it. Well, that's if you want a real look into the exact life that Brian Stolman is having right now. I swear that whoever wrote that movie, must have called one of my best friends and asked, "what is the story of Brian Stolman's life right now?" And the answer they received was this movie. It was amazing. Never have i felt so connected to a movie. I saw something like 11 movies this summer. Great actions, great dramas, blockbusters and more, but this was the best movie i saw. It hit me. It hit that spot in your soul where you can relate to it better than anyone else can. The opening line of the movie states, "This is not a love story, this is a story about love." The boy was not going to be happy until he met the one girl he knew he could love forever and the girl he falls for is a free spirit who has no intentions of settling down or committing to him. Story of my relationship with her. I know exactly what i want in this life, maybe a bit too much, which is probably why God pulled her out of my life at such a screeching halt. I think it was to tell me that he knows what he wants for me. Don't worry about what you want, i'll take care of you and you'll be happy.

So what was the point of having her in my life? I thought God put her there! I truly did. Maybe he put her there to teach me things, yea. But why then did he have me fall so deeply in love? Why did he make me fall so hard, when he knew she wasn't going to fall that hard at all? The feeling of being left behind, or as the toy who was kicked under the bed and completely forgotten about. it's a crappy feeling. It's a real crappy feeling.....

"Faith makes all things possible...love makes all things easy."