"New York Girls"

It's been a long while since I've written in here. My life, mind, heart, attitudes and outlooks have changed greatly from the last time that I wrote. I guess lately, i just haven't had much to write about. Or i guess i've had enough going on where i don't need to talk to a blank slate and tell you my thoughts or problems. I'm sitting here right now and i feel much more like writing a literal entry than my usual metaphoric entries.

I'm in my room, at my beautiful 3 bedroom townhome, actually watching Titanic. Here's the kicker. I'm watching it muted, while listening to the instrumental soundtrack on my computer. What a great movie. Passion, heart, death, fear and love. Just some of the emotions displayed in pure image. The boat is almost all but sank. There are a few people still dumb enough to think that they have a chance to get off. Then it shows the captain. People are coming to him with questions and requests, he says nothing. He walks off into the room with the steering wheel and closes the door. He waits for the pressure of the water to come crashing through the windows and take his life. . . A Good Captain Always Goes Down With His Ship.

I've had a terrible week, which followed a great weekend. I returned from Michigan only to be really sick and miss 4 days of work. In those 4 days, i received two counts of terrible news. The first one is that the men renting our townhome to us, have an illness and have to move back to canada, and in doing that need more money, which means....yep, you guessed it, they have to sell the townhome. Brian's gotta find a new place to live come the end of October. Not a big deal, just something very nice and comfortable that I thought was set in stone, is clearly not. Now on to the biggest shocker. My x-girlfriend. The one I was madly in love with. The one i wanted to be with forever, finally gets a hold of me tonight, after days of trying throughout the past 2 weeks. We talk for about 40 minutes. It was good, we caught up, she moved to New York. She's doing well. I'm doing well. We reminisce about us a little bit, it was weird and not something i expected, but it was fine. Then she tells me the most shocking news i've ever heard. "I'm engaged!"

Wow............

This is a girl who broke up with me because one of the main things i wanted was to marry her and be with her the rest of my life. Other factors came along with the break up obviously. What a backstab. Always talked about how she was too young to be married, wanted to wait til she was 30. Wanted to see the world first. BULL! HYPOCRITE! People disappoint you ya know. Sin, it's amazing. Trust is key too, and gets rocked at times.

"people always leave"